You are not my babysitter.

Everyone wants someone responsible and smart that can manage a great self-taken photo to watch their child.

http://charleston.craigslist.org/kid/1215883020.html

No. Just no.

http://nymag.com/daily/fashion/2009/06/american_apparel_has_gone_too.html?mid=fashion-alert--20090604&imw=Y&f=most-viewed-24h5

Being a Red Bull Girl

The backpack. The car. The fact that you're passing out free energy drinks to Rons at an apartment complex pool for your job.

The Woes of Fame

Real Housewife Ramona Singer got mad when the paparazzi at Axe in Southampton ditched her to take shots of Nick Cannon, lifting up her husband's shirt in attempts to catch their attention (no one cared), and eventually weaseling herself into a shot with Cannon. (nymag.com)

Poor Nick Cannon. Not only is he a C-lister at best, he now must contend with a "real" housewife whose claim to fame is a bad dye job and a bratty daughter. Fontrum.

Wedding Napkins

Ah, marrying young. You've already found that perfect soulmate so why wait any longer? Your wedding will be a night of dancing, drunkeness and random touches to distinguish your overblown giant expenditure of an affair from all the rest that are exactly the same. Here are a few napkins from the reception of a recently graduated couple. Perhaps they should change the "Did you know?" to "Does anyone care?" (Hint: the answer is no.)







P.S. You know you're whipped when you let your girlfriend admit to hundreds of friends and strangers that you've memorized the entire soundtrack to RENT.

Meet Justin Gaston

As if I wasn't jealous of Miley Cyrus enough already, her boyfriend came out with this inspirational interview. Choice quote: "Please don't be mean to me on twitter. I'm just a guy...I'm just a guy with a dream." Too true, Justin.

http://theblemish.com/2009/05/is-justin-gaston-really-this-retarded/

Craig Devious

http://jezebel.com/5255830/wtf-moment-on-morning-tv

Good to know that at least SHE thinks her thoughts are true.